The Ancient Egyptians believed in magic words which enabled your soul to live foever. But this knowledge wasn't avilable to everybody. If you didn't have the money, you couldn't pay the temple scribes to give you a scroll containg their secret, mystical formula. And if you didn't get the magic words right, then your soul would be eaten by a horrible monster that was part-lion, part-alligator and part hippopotamus.
Author of x articles
I don't like this "author of [number of] articles" business in the appeals. I understand that we don't want to get into the complexities of how articles are made in an appeal: appeals should be simple and direct. However, I don't think we want to wilfully mislead our public by giving them the impression that one person authors each article either. I think the appeal should just say "Wikipedia volunteer" or suchlike and should certainly not identify anyone as the author of a number of articles. --Bodnotbod 16:18, 7 November 2011 (UTC)